Tag: struggle

The title of this post has very much so been very relevant to me just recently.

I’ve seen first hand someone worrying over something that I think is actually very small, and should not really be anything to be too concerned about. No I will not be sharing the details, but I do I intend to share some of my thoughts/lessons I have learned, through the experience.

So, where to start?
Repeating the title??

Try to Not just dismiss someone’s problems/difficulties.

If we see someone struggling with something rather small, and what we think is rather insignificant, then it can be very tempting to just brush it off as nonsense. We could possibly be tempted to just say, “Oh come on, just get over it man (or woman)!”

How helpful would such words be???

This is were it can get very confusing right from the start.
For one person, the above words could be just what they need to hear. If the rebuke brings about a change of thinking that leads to holiness, then it could be just the thing to do.

However, if the person receiving the rebuff doesn’t receive the rebuff in a good way, then could it just become an extra weight for them to carry?

The extra weight could reveal itself as thoughts like, “Why am I worrying about this? This is so small and insignificant. Is there something seriously wrong with me, because I just can’t seem to let this go, even though everyone keeps telling me that this is nothing!”

Are you starting to see how this can get very confusing, right out of the starting blocks?

I’m thinking that the only place to start looking into this, is to ask the question, “Why are you saying, what you are saying?”

Are you operating from a position of frustration or love?
If you are operating from a position of frustration, then are you just unloading your frustrations onto someone who is already carrying a load that is too heavy for them, regardless of what you think about the lightness of their load?

Operating from a position of frustration is always going to be a bad starting point.
However, The Lord Our God can turn our bad starts around for His good and His glory. But how much better will it be if we can make a good start?

Could operating from a position of love be a better start?
I’m hoping that everyone is saying yes to that one. 🙂

A rebuke from a friend sent in love should be so much easier to bear with when compared to a rebuke from an enemy who just wants to taunt and ridicule you.

Do you want to be a friend or an enemy to the one in trouble? (No matter how small the trouble is.)

I’ve written about How to help someone who doesn’t want help in a previous post. I’ve also written about (in a round about way) why are you bringing a word of …… to …… in a post called A word from the Lord, or a word from the enemy.
If you are prompted to, then consider having a read/re-read of one or both of them.

If you do see someone struggling with something that you think is just tiny, then is there a better response than just, “Pull yourself together man (or woman)!”

Could you bring words of encouragement instead?
Words of encouragement from the Bible could be a good start.

Philippians 4:13
¹³ I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Jeremiah 29:11
¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Psalm 73:26
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.

2 Corinthians 12:9
⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

The above are but only a small number of encouraging bible verses that can be found, in the bible.
The bible is actually just fully loaded with the Good Stuff. We just need to read it and be fed by it!

I think that I should try to sum this post up now, before it just becomes an epic full length book. 🙂

If a word of rebuke is needed, then can we bring it in love?
If a word of encouragement is needed, then can we bring that in love?
And Lord, can we please have the discernment to know what is needed, for any given situation.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7
⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

With a title like this one you might think that I am a person who suffers with anxiety.
On the most part I don’t, but just recently my mind has not been working quite how I would like it to. It’s been (what I call) a little bit fuddled and muddled. It’s been like it’s been stuck in the wrong gear either going too slow, for my liking or spinning away over nonsense.
It’s meant that I’ve not been able to do some of the things that I think I should have been able to do.
It’s all been a bit frustrating, to say the least.

I have asked various groups who I meet with (who I trust) to pray for my troubled mind.
One person did ask, “Is there anything that you are anxious about?”
Initially, I just smiled at that thought. No, life is generally OK, so I’m not really anxious about anything.

The thought didn’t leave me though, and as I have pondered on it, then I have come to realise that a smallish project that I’m trying to do something with has been playing on my mind, a bit more than it possibly should. Even when I’m not thinking about it, it’s still there in the background somewhere, mulling itself over.
If my subconscious could talk to me, then it might possibly be screaming out, “Just put this one on the shelf for a moment!” 🙂

Could this possibly be the cause of my muddled thinking???

Sometimes I can go through something and part of my way of dealing with it is writing about it. Some things may get published and other things get deleted. Once I’ve finished writing this one, then I’ll decide if it’s to be published, stored or deleted.

So what’s the purpose of writing all this?
On one level it’s your try and get it all straightened out in my own mind.
It could also possibly help someone with a muddled mind or someone who knows somebody, with a muddled mind…

My muddled thinking just kind of crept up on me.
Because it was a gradual thing it took a bit of time for me to notice it. I guess it was only when I was unhappy with my mind that I noticed it.
I’m guessing that’s the first step, acknowledging that something is wrong. I didn’t self diagnose that I was struggling with anxiety, I just simply knew year my mind wasn’t working as I wanted it to.

The next thing I did was to ask for help.
The form of help I asked for was, prayer for my troubled mind that just wouldn’t do what I knew it should be able to do.
This did lead to a question which lead to the self analysis that you have just read above.

When I realised that this project was playing on my mind, I could then (and did) ponder and prayerfully consider it.
I even asked for people to pray that I might know how to deal with this project. I didn’t divulge all the details of the project, just enough so that people might have a better idea of how to pray.
I do think that this an important point to note when asking for prayer.
You don’t need to divulge all the details to everybody, use a bit of wisdom as to what is needed to be shared and to whom you share it with.

Asking for help/prayer can sometimes be a bit of a difficult thing to do.
The question I dread most goes along the lines of, “What’s causing you to feel this way?”
If I knew the answer to that, then would I be asking for help in the first place???

A previous post of A Moden Day Plank in the Eye looks deeper into this thought. A brief summary of that post, I’m looking for God’s help more than I’m looking for man’s.

I do understand that man can have the correct answers at times, but I also know that God has all the answers, all the time.
We just need to hear what He is saying to us.

So, what could you do if you have a troubled mind?
Could you follow something of the process I went through?
Acknowledge that something is wrong.
Ask for help.
Consider (prayerful consideration works best) any words which are spoken to you (from both man and God), even if you initially dismiss them.
If needed seek further prayer/help with the answers you receive.
If you ask Him to help you then your Loving Heavenly Father can help, lead and guide you to what is the best way to go.

How could you help someone who has a bit of a troubled mind?
If it’s a friend who’s struggling, then could you just simply be a good friend?
Could you help out where you can? Could you not meddle where it’s not needed?
Prayerful consideration of ….. should give you the best answers of what to do.

I have written a post called How can we help those who don’t want help? I don’t think I need to explain what it’s about as the title says it all. If you are prompted to, then have a read of it.

My best advice for everyone is always to seek your Loving Heavenly Father. He knows just what you need at all times and is there for you, if you will just try to seek Him and His wisdom.

As for me…. well, I’m doing better than I was. I might not quite be where I would like to be, but improvements have been made.
I dare say that I’m just like everyone else, in that, I’m still a work in progress. 🙂

Last week’s post came from, another strange dream.

In the dream I was at work, trying to complete a task that was new to me.
As it was new to me, I was doing rather badly at the task.
I didn’t quite know what I was doing. I kind of knew what to do, but I just hadn’t put everything together.
My supervisor was loosing his patience, and he was letting me know just what he thought of me.

In the dream I kind of thought, “The heck with you. Do I care what you think? I’ll do this at my own pace and you can either like if or lump it.”

I think I can sum this response up as defiance.
I am not going to let you upset me.
It was in effect, putting on the old armour. Creating a hard skin, so as not to be hurt by the supervisor.

Hence the post, “Will you Remove your Ancient Armour, and Replace it with God’s Armour?” was written.

I do think that there is a value to the dream all on its own, hence my sharing it now.

Defiance is a hardening that we can be subjected to, if we are attacked in some way.
If we put defiance on too closely, then can it become the ancient armour I wrote about last week?

Sometimes we may need to hand ……. over to our Loving Heavenly Father, so that we do not let the defiance in us, define who we are.

So is there a better response that I could have had in the dream?
Accept, Repent and Forgive ???
Could doing the process of accept, repent and forgive be putting on God’s armour???

In the dream, I do think that I was in the position of potential instead of neat and tidy. I had the potential to be better, but I needed time to learn.
Time my supervisor didn’t have, and hence his response.

Can we, at times, take on the role of the supervisor?
Can we sometimes be more concerned with the task being completed than the individual who is trying their best? (If they are indeed trying their best.)
If we are in the role of the supervisor then can we try to be a supervisor that will inspire people to give their best? Instead of causing hurt and defiance, can we bring help and blessings?

Father,
Help us your hear the words that you are speaking to us.
Help us to hand anything that You ask for over to You.
If we are in a position of leading someone, then help us to do it in a way that will bring the best out of them.
Help us to have a positive impact wherever we are and in whatever we are doing.
Amen.

I see before me an individual dressed in a suit of armour.
It offers protection to the one who wears it, but there are draw backs to the amour. It’s armour that won’t come off, so it is taken everywhere the owner goes.

The armour does offer some protection, but there is a price to be paid. Hugs in a suit of armour are never quite the same. (For both hugger and hugee.) The weight of the armour can be very heavy at times and can slow down the one dressed in it. The armour is not a perfect fit, and as such it rubs against the skin, causing sores all of its own, not to mention any hurts it’s covering up.

You may feel that you need your armour, but there is a better alternative, God’s Armour!

Where your armour may be made from iron and steel, God’s Armour employs a force field technology. It’s so light you won’t even know that you are wearing it. You can move about freely, completely unhindered.
But when it is needed, then a force field is projected that is soooo much stronger than anything iron and steel can offer. It’s also put in place at just the right moment so you can have full protection without the hindrance of the old.

In order to put on this new armour, the old must first be removed.

This may be a pain full thing to do. Your Loving Heavenly Father can provide for you a protected changing room to do this.
Follow His prompting, and He will lead and guide you to where it is safe to make the exchange.
He will remove the burden of the old, as you hand it to Him.
He Will then bring a healing and cleaning touch to the wounds that have been hidden for too long. He will restore and renew you, as you allow Him to.
He will then dress you in the new armour.
It may feel strange for a while, until you become accustomed to the new, but it will be so much better than the old. You will be able to experience life to the full, not held back or obscured by anything from the past.
You will be as you are meant to be.

As Christians, all we need to do your put on this new armour is to follow His prompting to us. When He asks us your hand something over to Him, then hand it over to Him. It will be for your benefit.

If you are not a Christian, then in an instant you can be, and then you too can have access to this armour.
You just need to say yes to God.
You just need to ask Him into your life, to lead and guide you in the way you should go.
To say Yes to your Loving Heavenly Father will be the best choice you can ever make.

This is something we all have to deal with at some point in time.
Change is always happening around us all the time, after all.

But it is the bigger changes which can be more unsettling (at times).
How we deal with the changes which happen around us is the important factor.

We can look at all those bits we don’t like…. and complain about them. (Not such a good option.)

The Israelites did this in the desert… Back in Egypt we had ….

What the Israelites managed to forget is that they were in bondage in Egypt, they were slaves.

So why were they pining over Egypt?

Was it because they were heading into something new, and didn’t have the vision for the new?

Was it because they were experiencing change, and change can be unsettling?

When we are heading into something new, which Father has for us, then the enemy wants to hold us back, or even pull us back (if we let him).

1 Peter 5:8, : “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

When we are unsettled, it at these times when the enemy can try to whisper all the louder in our ears, and all the more so if Father is trying to lead us into his goodness.

The enemy will use whatever he can to stop us.

Wasn’t it better back in….?
Do you really want to be here?
You don’t know what your doing!

The enemy will use all the above lies and many more to try to stop us in our tracks.

We need to understand where the thoughts are coming from!

If they are from the enemy, then we need to rebuke them and send them away.

Sometimes when I’m feeling the pressure of such thoughts, I have (in my mind) stared down at the thoughts and said,
I see you, now be gone, in the power of my Lord Jesus Christ.

I then invite Father to enter into my mind and the situation instead.

John 10:27
My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.

We need to look to, hear, trust and follow Father in all things.

Father,
Help us to hear You more than anybody else.
Help us to truly know Your voice, so that we can follow You.
Thank you that You do Love us.
Amen

This is something which I have wanted to write about, and to not write about in equal measure.

I have just been reminded of it again… So I’ll give it a try at putting something down on paper (or on the screen).

I don’t have a lot of experience in this matter, thankfully. But I can remember a time, when a particular computer game, took too much of my time.

I’m not going to give any details of which game it was, but it was a form of escapism for me at the time.

I was generally unhappy and struggling with life in general, and to be able to plug into something which would remove me from my reality (which I didn’t like) was very appealing, but not too helpful.

I was a believer at the time (and still am), and as such, kind of knew that I should be running to Father for help.
I did go to Father, of a fashion, but the pull of the game was still very strong and subtle.
It was easy to turn the console on and just plug into the game.
It was always available and ready to whisk me off to another word where I could just forget about my reality for a short while. (Or what turned out to be a longer time than it should have been.)

I can remember reaching the point where I began to not like the game.
I might have even started to approach despising the game I sooo longed to play.

But turn it on and plug in was always my desire, which at one point, was my go to place for far too much of my time.

So why did I do it?

Why should I trade a true reality for something which was fake? (Which I knew was fake.)

Why was I so willing do something which I didn’t like?

Why would I do something which I knew, wasn’t going to be helpful to me in the long run?

I think the short answer is, that I was in pain.

I was unhappy and wanted anything to dull the pain.

Thankfully the thing I went to, was just the game and not anything else that could have been so much worse.
There are many things that people can go to to dull the pain which could have been more difficult to turn away from. So I do thank God, that my thing I went to was just a minor escapism. (It didn’t feel too minor at the time though.)

I can remember reaching a time when I did have enough of the game.

But I couldn’t just stop playing it.

As much as I loathed it, I still played it.

I believe it was because I felt that I had nothing else that would dull the pain I was feeling.

Is this one small aspect of what it is to be addicted to something?

Not wanting it, but still picking it up anyway?

Knowing that it is doing you no good, but not seeing any other way of doing anything, other than the thing you don’t want to?

I think that one of the turning points for me was recognising where I was, and then wanting for things to change. And then trying to make change happen. (Not an easy task if you are in a bad place.)

So, how did I make the change happen?

I spoke to my Heavenly Father. (I was always speaking to Him on some level really.)

I asked Him to give me something else that would be more real to me and better for me.

I asked for Him to be more real to me.

I asked Him if I could plug into Him instead of the game in a meaningful way, so that I wouldn’t want to play the game any longer.

short summary, I reconised that I wanted things to change, I asked for help and I endeavoured to look for something better, rather than my go to not so helpful thing.

Well, I have managed to type something down.
But who could this be for?

If you are caught in something which you don’t like, then perhaps this could help you???
Instead of focusing on what you don’t want to do, you could try looking for something else that is better and will be better for you.
I once heard someone say, “Instead of using the brakes to avoid something, you could always use the steering wheel.”
Handing what you don’t like to God and asking for His help is always going to be good advice.

If you know someone who is caught in some kind of destructive behaviour that they just can’t seem to shake, then could this be for you???
If you do know someone who is just doing something which is no good for themselves, then what could you do?
Try to understand them???
Try to see them as someone who is in pain and not thinking correctly???
Try not to judge them??? (This could be a very tough one to do.)
Try to offer them a life line by offering a better alternative???
My best advice would always be to seek your Heavenly Father who knows ALL that is going on. Seek His wisdom for what the best option to do is. Endeavour to hear His words to you, and then follow them.

Father,
I’ve had a go at writing this.
I offer it up to You.
Please do with it whatever You want to.
If there is someone who You want to read it, then please lead them to it.
If You want to keep people away from this, then please let this be lost in the desert of posts out there.
For all who are suffering, I ask that You will be real to them in a meaningful way so that they can know a release, that You can bring to them.
You are Lord God Almighty, and You Do know All things and are there to help and guide all who call on You.
Amen.