The Release that Forgiveness Brings.

This week, as I write this, has had its ups and downs. I’m not going to share the full details, it would take too long and be of little value. But I will share an observation, or two, that I’ve made, some of which, that I kind of already knew, but then had to put into practice.

I had a major misunderstanding.
I was very much so annoyed by this misunderstanding, and so was the other person involved.
Our conversation become a bit heated.
We both parted feeling frustrated.

I, of course was fully in the right!!! …… ??? 🙂

How much are we ever fully in the right???

There are some small things that I did, that I know, could have been taken the wrong way, and as such fuelled the misunderstanding.
From my point of view, the other was more wrong than me. But did I do or say things that didn’t help???

Needless to say, I was operating from a position of frustration, annoyance, and dare I even say it….. anger. 😦

Thankfully at some point I recognised this and kind of knew that I needed to forgive the other party involved.
So I endeavoured to do just that.

I said aloud, “I forgive the one who has been and who is upsetting me.” (Not necessarily the exact words I used, but hopefully you get the idea.) I didn’t say this to the person, face to face, but just to the room that I was in.
Saying “I forgive you” face to face, would probably have only been adding more fuel to the fire.

Change then came about in the situation, or more to the point, in me.
A large amount of the heat, just left.
I would like to say that in was a picture of serene peace, but that would be a blatant lie. But I was, on the whole, a lot better than I was.

Anger and frustration were no longer my main driving force, pushing me to justify myself and point out the others errors.

The problem remained exactly the same, but at least now I could try to do something about it without the heat of pain, anger, and frustration putting the gas pedal to the floor and steering me in an unhelpful direction.

So what did I do next?

I felt that I needed to write an email, to try and state clearly, without the emotions. what I thought had gone on, from my point of view.

I did not want to do this.
I kind of thought that anything that I would do, would be adding fuel to the fire.
I just wanted to either ignore everything or go directly to a supervisor and try to state my point of view to them. (It was a work related situation, of sorts.)

In the end I listened to the small quiet voice, that just said, “Write an email.”
The email was written, with (I believe) the help of that same small quiet voice. Then I sent it to the one that I wanted nothing to do with. …..
Then nothing.

There was no phone call or reply email.
Time was going by and something needed to be done, because a deadline was approaching fast. So now it was time to make a call and seek a supervisor’s help/point of view.

During the call with the supervisor, it became apparent to me that the individual who I sent the email to wasn’t in that day.
They hadn’t even seen the email, so couldn’t have even responded to it.
What good fortune for me. 🙂

The supervisor appraised the situation (by seeing a copy of the email sent) and agreed that working with a different person was probably best.
Other things were clarified, and a plan to go forward was put in place.

How I feel so greatly blessed for sending an email that I didn’t want to send. (Were my actions being directed by Someone much Greater than me… ???)

My meeting with the new person was tense to begin with, but as we both just focused on going forward (without speaking about the history) the tension soon eased and we could concentrate on the work that needed to be done, in as friendly manner as we could.

I would like to say that full reconciliation has taken place, but it hasn’t. I’m unlikely to need to deal with the person I had the troubles with, so how much effort should be put into reconciliation?

Could me seeking reconciliation, in this instance, be causing more pain than is needed with little up side?
Could seeking reconciliation, be me trying to say, “I was right, all along!” ????

This post started as a comment I made to a YouTube video.
It seems quite apt to end this post by repeating that same comment here now.

I had a situation that caused me a great deal of frustration this week.
There was plenty of Heat that went away as I said aloud “I forgive the one one who is doing this to me.”
The problem remained, but I was then able to deal with it …. without the Heat playing it’s part. I do feel that My Lord directed me and the problem is mostly dealt with, small details remain, but they are small and are manageable.
The Power of Forgiveness is Great, and All the more Powerful when done in front of Our Heavenly Father.

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Forgiveness is Key

Forgiveness and Reconciliation are Two very Different Things